My intentions for this post were for February 13, but God
had other plans for that day then to blog. I felt February 13 was a good time
to announce a change in my life. A change that I had found out many were not
supporters of. A change that was often the center of peoples jokes. But the one
change that was bringing me peace and understanding as well as forgiveness to
the mistakes I have made along the way in this place we call life.
You see, February 13 was the first day of Lent or Ash
Wednesday. Lent is the preparation for the resurrection of Jesus Christ on
Easter Sunday. Before I moved to Minot, I had the discussion with Duane about converting to Catholicism and even though he is Catholic, he remained unbiased and listened while I listed my pros and cons.
[Side note: Remember how I mention this change has often
been the center of people’s jokes? Commonly, the first thing out of people’s
mouths when they hear I am converting is “Let me guess, your boyfriend is
Catholic and you want him to marry you so you are converting?]
FUN FACT: Both individuals do not have to be Catholic to get
married in a Catholic church; it is up to the Priest if he chooses to marry
you. I guess I can see why people would automatically assume I would join since Duane was already Catholic, but for me it was different. Three weeks before moving, I contacted two of the Catholic churches here to learn more about the classes they offer for individuals looking to convert. I instantly felt accepted by Our Lady of Grace Parish in their excitement about the classes and number of responses I received from their administration.
Duane was aware of me contacting the churches until I had
agreed to meet with them once I had settled in. He was happy, but he wanted to
make sure I was doing it for me.
Shortly after, I sat my parents down and told them about my
thoughts of going through the classes to convert. They weren’t surprised, but
the idea did raise questions. After ensuring them I would not have a million children
and that Duane was really oblivious to my whole thought process they blessed my
decision.
When I moved I went and met with the Deacon at Our Lady of
Grace about a month later. I never thought a basic meeting would turn into such
a heartfelt conversation. I often find myself being the type of person who
tends to hide my past in fear that I will be judged, but on that day it all
came out. Every secret I ever kept to myself. The weight was finally being
lifted off of me.
Again, it wasn’t until right before I walked into the church
that I informed Duane that I was about to go speak to the Deacon about the
church and the classes. About two weeks before the classes began, I let the
rest of my family in on my decision; shocking some while others saw it coming
simply because “Duane is Catholic.”
Classes started in October and much like my initial face to
face conversation, I was hooked from the beginning. I loved reading the
scripture, hearing others opinions, being able to have the Deacon pray for and with
me and hearing life stories of how others found faith.
My biggest struggles came outside of our weekly meeting.
Besides my immediate family and Duane’s, I wasn’t feeling much support. In
fact, I was feeling the complete opposite. I was meeting people outside of
church who were Catholic, but when I told them I was converting they would say
things like “Hey, I’m Catholic… during Easter!” Here I was looking to be
accepted into their faith and family yet they seemed to make jokes about it.
The jokes continued as people kept finding out about my life change ranging
from making fun of the Eucharist, sign of the cross to the Pope.
Like any constant joke or picking, these things really got
to me. I arranged a time to meet with the Deacon of the church to discuss how
to better handle these situations and to form support situations.
Despite the struggle, I was never ashamed of becoming
Catholic. It was my decision from the beginning and I believed whole-heartedly
that it was God’s will for me to become Catholic. Duane has been my rock
through the process and it is so exciting to talk to my family or his about the
things I have learned weekly.
One of the most memorable moments of the class was being
able to choose a Saint’s name. Our role was to identify a Saint in which we
felt inspired by and wanted to follow their example. I turned to Duane in this
process, knowing that he would know more about Saints then I would. I knew the
name I wanted, but was unsure if it was an option.
Through scripture reading, Duane and I came to the
conclusion that my Saint name would be Ruth.
Ruth is from the Old Testament and similar to her, we have both overcome
our hardships through the strength of our faith. Ruth means compassionate,
companion and friend. Coincidently, both of my grandmother’s names were Ruth.
While I was never given the chance to meet my maternal grandmother, I have been
told that she held true to her name characteristics. Both have played a
significant impact on my life and I wanted to forever honor them. Knowing I
could now be named after them seemed the perfect way and I hope I can live up
to their characteristics.
The hardest part of the six month process has been not
having Duane with me. Of course I am not the only one in the class. We have
several couples or families going through as well. Duane did not force me to
become Catholic. He never once asked me become Catholic. But, watching him
kneel at church, pray at dinner and most of all having faith in me became my
deciding factor. The course would have been a great building block for our
relationship, but due to being in separate locations I went through the class
alone.
I will be receiving three of the seven sacraments at the
Easter Vigil Mass. Both of our family will be attending the Mass. As a surprise
to Duane, I had it arranged to have him be part of the Mass with me. It is an
honor to know he can be a part of a day that he taught me so much about.
“For where you go, I will go..” –Ruth 1: 16-17
